Why Your Dreams Don’t Come True – 11 Proven Reasons

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All people have dreams of what they want to achieve in life, and you have them too. But somehow, most of your dreams don’t come true, and that’s a fact for the people around you too. Why is that?

In this post we describe 11 proven reasons why your dreams don’t come true and tell you what you should be doing instead. If you follow the guidelines listed here, you will be well on your way to fulfilling virtually all of your dreams.

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Your Dreams Are Not Your Goals

 

There are dreams that are common to many people, like having financial independence, and time and space independence. That is, people want to have enough money to “not care” about money issues, they want to be able to set their own schedule according to their desires, and they want to be able to be anywhere they want, whenever they want to.

Of course, people also have their own individual dreams. One wants to be a poet, the other a movie star, the third a famous scientist, and so on.

Sounds familiar? Well, as you know, most people don’t realize most, or even any of these dreams, and most likely, most of your dreams don’t come true either.

I remember the time when I was constantly telling my friends that I’m going to have a lot of money and be “free” from any time, space, or money limitation. One of my friends replied: “Yeah, well, everybody wants that”, to which I replied: “No. Everybody dreams about it. I’m actually going to get it.”

And I did. You see, the difference between me and a lot of my friends was that we wanted similar things, but they never believed it was a real option for them, while I never believed there was any other option for me. I set it as a goal, I wholeheartedly believed I would make it, I only chose paths in my life that aligned with my goal, and I eventually reached it.

Do the same. Don’t wonder why your dreams don’t come true – set them as real goals.

You Are Not Focused

 

Whatever your mind constantly concentrates on, this is where life will lead you. But what if your mind keeps on jumping between ideas? I knew someone who wanted to be a fashion designer, then a bookstore owner, then a photographer, then a model, then a fashion advisor, and all those changes happened in the course of one year.

If you don’t have a clear goal that you firmly stand behind, it’s obvious you’re not going to reach any meaningful destination. But what if you legitimately have multiple goals? In that case, you should prioritize your goals and mostly move to a new goal only when the more prioritized one is finished.

When you’re focused on one thing only, your mind is sharp, you’re more efficient, and you achieve better results in a shorter time frame. This is true for anything from simple tasks to goals that require a lot of work to reach. Unfortunately, many people let unimportant things distract them from what’s really important.

Consider, for example, the case where you’re writing a very detailed email to a company you’d like to do business with. Suddenly, you receive a text message from your friend saying “check out this cool video”, so you decide to check it out. It’s cool, so you text your friend back about it, and you spend several more minutes texting, before you get back to your email.

What have you lost? The obvious answer is 10 minutes in which you could’ve worked on the email. But it’s much worse than that. You lost your concentration, your line of thought, and any ideas you had in your mind and haven’t written yet. Now, you need to reread the email to try to salvage something from the flow you had when you were “in the zone” earlier. You don’t only lose even more time, but you also end up with a lower-quality email.

Many people have a problem staying focused, and that’s why they don’t realize their dreams. Make sure you focus as much as you can on one thing at a time, according to its priority, and only move to the next item on your list when you’re done with the previous one.

Why Your Dreams Don't Come True - Man Climbing a Mountain

You Are Afraid of Taking Risks

 

You can’t expect to win big if you’re not willing to take the necessary risks. In order to grow and achieve more you must get out of your comfort zone, and sometimes it means you will have to do things that you’re really afraid of.

Most people enjoy staying in their comfort zone. It’s … well … comfortable. It’s “safe” and it’s what “everybody is doing”, so why take extra risks, start stressing out, maybe lose your current “status”, and possibly not even achieve anything, right?

Wrong. This line of thought is exactly why your dreams don’t come true. People don’t realize their dreams because they’re afraid. They keep on thinking about the things they will “lose” if they fail, instead of concentrating on how much they’ll gain when they succeed.

The sad thing about it is that they stay in a job they don’t want, or in a relationship that’s bad for them, or with a low salary, or any other thing, just because they’re afraid to lose whatever they already have. It doesn’t even matter that they don’t like what they have or feel stuck in life.

Some people say that getting fired from their job was the best thing that happened to them. Think about that for a moment. They needed someone else to fire them from a job they didn’t really want to be in. How many years of their lives have they wasted in a job that made them unhappy? And what was the result of holding on to their jobs for dear life? They lost their jobs anyway.

Do not confuse risk-taking with irresponsibility, though. You do not want to be irresponsible, which simply means acting foolishly. Risk-takers make smart decisions that contain some risk in them, but in a responsible manner.

Consider, for example, people who perform stunts in movies. It is clear that they are well trained, and that safety precautions are in place. Still, they take risks and might get injured, but they do it responsibly. However, it would most likely be a foolish and irresponsible idea for you to try to perform the same acts.

To summarize, people who are afraid don’t realize their dreams. Be brave. Responsibly.

You Take a Different Path in Life

 

You can’t have a goal, and then make significant decisions that don’t align with your goal. If your goal is to be a singer, it doesn’t help you much to take a 12-hour a day, 5 days a week job in a construction company. You should look for something that is related to the career you want to develop.

If your goal is to have time independence, it makes little sense to work in places that require you to work many hours a week, with a schedule you have no control of.

If your goal is space independence, having a job that doesn’t allow you to work remotely doesn’t make sense either.

You see, whenever you make significant choices that don’t align with your goal, at best you keep the same distance from your goal and just delay reaching it. But most likely, what happens is that you start drifting away from your goal.

The environment around you can significantly affect you, so you must make sure that the environment you choose is in alignment with your goal. After all, your environment is your choice.

You Don’t Believe You Can Make It

 

Let me tell you something right off the bat: Most people are not going to support your goal. You know why? Because they don’t realize their dreams themselves, so they either think no one they know can, or are sort of jealous. I mean, if you realize your dreams and they don’t, what does that say about them?

I want you to imagine yourself telling your friends and family about your goal, and all (or most) of them tell you that it’s crazy and you shouldn’t do it. If your goal is worth anything, most likely it’s going to be the reality, so you’d better think about it now. Maybe you’ve already experienced it before.

The people who are most likely to support you are the people who have already broken out of their mental “prison” and know that you can achieve whatever you want if you put your mind to it. But how many such people do you know?

Now what happens if you also have low self-confidence or low self-esteem? If people tell you that you can never achieve your goal and that it’s silly, you’ll most likely give up on your goal.

Keep in mind that you can either be your worst enemy or your best friend. Your dreams don’t come true, and in fact, can’t come true, when you don’t really believe in them. And I’m not talking about a belief that comes and goes, depending on your mood. I’m talking about an unshaken belief that you will reach your goal.

You should work every day on increasing your confidence that you will reach your goal, and have a firm belief that you will make it, despite what everyone else tells you. Remember that 95% of the people don’t reach their real, deep goals, and that’s why you shouldn’t pay any attention to anything negative they tell you about your ability to reach your goal.

Why Your Dreams Don't Come True - Lazy Dog

You Are Lazy

 

This one is simple. You don’t put the time and effort necessary to actually reach your goal. If you think that you can get to your dream goal in life without putting a lot of effort, you’re in for a big surprise, let me tell you.

Most likely, you make some excuses to justify why you’re not really doing enough, like:

  • You had a long day
  • You don’t really have time for anything
  • You don’t feel great
  • You’re not in the mood
  • You need a break
  • You can do it later
  • It’s not that important
  • It’s not urgent
  • You don’t feel like it right now

If any of these things sounds too familiar, you can be certain it’s one of the reasons why your dreams don’t come true.

It’s important that you ask yourself each time you have a “reason” for not doing something to advance your goal, whether it’s an actual reason or an excuse. Do you have high fever and have to get some rest, or do you just have a slight headache and are not in the mood? Do you really have no time, or can you spare 5 minutes to create a 1-minute video and upload it to social-media platforms?

You should do something to advance your goal every day, no matter how small that something is. If you’re true to yourself, you’ll realize that there’s always something that you can do. Even if it’s “just” mental work.

Do the maximum possible, though, while maintaining a healthy, balanced life.

You Are a Perfectionist

 

This is another reason for not really doing what it takes to succeed, or even not doing anything at all. In this scenario people don’t realize their dreams because they’re too concerned with their delivery not being “perfect”.

As Voltaire said, perfect is the enemy of good. Once you create something that is good, the worst thing you can do is to try to make it perfect. It will take too much of your time, and you’ll never get there. You should whatever you have made (assuming, again, that it’s good) and move on.

People who insist on delivering only “perfect” products, services, ideas, and so on, end up with not delivering anything at all, which should make it pretty obvious why they don’t realize their dreams, right?

I once knew a girl, who made money making videos for people. She did that both on her day job and as a freelancer. She would both shoot the videos and edit them. Sometimes her clients liked the first version more, sometimes less, but she always changed whatever they wanted, she always got paid for her work, and she even had repeat clients. So you can see that the quality of her work was appreciated by people.

That same girl wanted to create videos of herself and put them on different social-media platforms. She wanted to do that for months. Last I heard, she never did. You know why? Because not only were her videos “not good enough” as far as she was concerned, she wanted to first have a “perfect plan” of what videos she was going to make. “Perfect plan” + “perfect videos” = no videos at all.

So don’t be a perfectionist – work with what you have right now, make the best that you can, and get better along the way.

You Are Mentally Weak

 

On the road to achieving your goal you will fail. A lot. The higher your goal, the more you’re going to fail. It’s a fact of life – nothing to be surprised or upset about. However, if you don’t understand that failing is good for you, you may lose hope after several failures, and quit.

In fact, some people already picture the failure in their mind before they even start doing something, and that’s exactly why they fail.

Even worse, some people are so confident they will fail, that they don’t even try. It’s no wonder they don’t realize their dreams.

Remember that failing doesn’t mean that you are a failure. As long as you get back on your feet and continue pushing forward, you can still succeed. The only time when you are guaranteed to “be” a failure, is when you decide to quit.

So don’t quit, don’t be deterred by failures, keep on pushing forward, and you’ll eventually get there.

Why Your Dreams Don't Come True - Girl and Clock

You Are Impatient

 

So you have this huge goal, and you think you will reach it in a month? Or maybe you have a more realistic deadline, but you feel that the progress you’ve made so far is not enough? Maybe you feel that you’re not getting better, that you can’t get enough clients, or whatever it is.

Reaching your goal is a process that takes time. Especially when you have a big goal that is far away from your current situation. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t put deadlines on your goals, but these deadlines need to be realistic. It’s obvious that if you now make $50,000 a year and your goal is to make one million dollars a year, that’s not going to happen tomorrow.

Once you put realistic deadlines on your goals and actually do everything that’s necessary, mentally and physically, to reach your goal, you will often find that you have reached your goal much faster than you have anticipated.

If, on the other hand, you put a deadline that is too short, or you start getting anxious about the rate of your progress, you will only start doubting yourself, lose your momentum, see even worse results, and eventually quit pursuing the goal altogether.

When you start something new, many times you don’t see almost any progress for a few months, or maybe even years, and then suddenly something happens and you get exponential growth. Don’t think of progress as something linear, because it usually isn’t.

Take for example a case, where you want to sell your product to companies, but no company wants it. You try and you try, but nothing works. Then, after many months, one company decides to get it and likes it. A different company hears that the first company got it and likes it, and they decide they want it too. Then, suddenly, 5 more companies hear about this and want the product. See where I’m going with this?

In short, do everything that you need to do every day, get better at what you’re doing, and patiently anticipate your success.

You Are Indecisive

 

Does it take you a long time to make a decision? Or maybe, after you make a decision, you tend to change it frequently? Both of these things are characteristics of people who don’t realize their dreams.

Many times in life you will be presented with opportunities that allow you to take a giant leap towards your goal. Most likely, these opportunities are short-lived, and if you don’t seize them “immediately”, they will be gone.

Can you think right now about some opportunities that you missed in life? I bet most people with enough experience in life have several such opportunities that they know they missed. The other ones might simply not yet be aware that there was an opportunity for them that they missed.

But what about simpler decisions, like going with option A or option B in your line of work? Does it take you a long time to decide? When you decide, are you fully committed to the decision, or do you second-guess yourself?

Napoleon Hill, in his book Think and Grow Rich, wrote that an analysis of several hundred highly-successful people showed that “every one of them had the habit of reaching decisions promptly, and of changing these decisions slowly, if, and when they were changed.”

Not being able to reach a decision and stick to it causes you to lose your peace of mind, which is a sure way to get farther away from your goal. When you have two forces fighting inside you, you can’t really move forward.

Make well-thought-out but quick decisions, and stick to them until you are absolutely certain you need to change them.

You Are a Solo Player

 

You cannot achieve anything really big on your own, and that’s a fact. You always need some assistance in different areas, or maybe even a partner. It could be because you’re not skilled in everything that’s needed (and there’s no need for you to be), or that you can’t possibly have enough time for everything.

In general, the more your business expands, the more you need to have people who work for you or assist you in things. This should come as no surprise.

However, the fact that you need to interact with other people in order to reach your goal does not mean you know how to be a team player. If you only know how to be a solo player, you’re not going to get far in life.

And being a solo player doesn’t only mean that you have problems working with people. It can also mean that you’re not open to receiving advice or coaching from people who are better, more experienced, and more successful than you in the areas that relate to your goal.

If you’re only open to your own ideas and you can’t really work with other people, it’s clear why your dreams don’t come true. You just refuse the necessary change.

Be a team player, and also learn from the people who have a proven track-record in areas relating to your goal. Consider yourself fortunate if they decide to teach you.

Why Your Dreams Don't Come True - Man with Hands Drawing

Summary

 

We showed 11 reasons why your dreams don’t come true:

  1. You don’t set your dreams as your goals
  2. You don’t focus on one dream, goal, or task at a time
  3. You’re afraid of taking risks
  4. You don’t align your life with your goals
  5. You don’t believe in yourself
  6. You don’t put the necessary time and effort
  7. You need everything to be perfect
  8. You can’t cope with failures
  9. You don’t have enough patience to wait for the results of your efforts
  10. You can’t reach a quick decision and stand by it
  11. You can’t work in a team or follow good advice that conflicts with your opinions

As you can see, achieving your goals requires a lot of mental effort. It’s probably the hardest thing you will ever have to do in your life, and that’s why most people don’t realize their dreams. But you can be certain that the effort of changing your behavior is well worth it.

Dreams can come true. Yes, even yours. And yes, virtually all of them. Do the mental work, avoid all the problems listed above, and you will see great success in your life.

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